Letters: Is It Bullying, or Is It Just Bad Behavior?

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Re "Defining Bullying Down" (Op-Ed, March 12):

Kudos to Emily Bazelon for stating that bullying is not "everything and everywhere," while reminding us, too, that bullying is not "a rite of childhood passage."

Bullying — aggressive behavior that is intentional, hurtful, threatening and persistent — is always wrong. No exceptions. Yet, as Ms. Bazelon points out, if we don't distinguish it from teenage "drama," it becomes too amorphous and huge a problem to address with specific programs and strategies.

Bullying is a cancer of sorts: it's psychologically malignant, and it can kill. But if we're not careful about our diagnosis, if we make "bullying" a catchall, then we won't implement successful protocols.

I know that it's possible to create kinder, gentler communities. In my role as "the anti-bullying novelist," I have visited schools where the bullying diagnosis and treatment are spot on.

As Ms. Bazelon points out, "we have the wherewithal now to attend to a psychological harm that has long deeply affected kids," but to address the problem in a meaningful way, we need to recognize exactly what it is. And, as Ms. Bazelon states, we need adults to set the tone in our camps and schools. Unfortunately, that doesn't always happen.

ELAINE WOLF
Northampton, Mass., March 12, 2013

The writer is the author of the novels "Camp" and "Danny's Mom."

To the Editor:

"Defining Bullying Down" addresses a growing concern in the bullying prevention field: whether the term "bullying" is overused. Although a common standard is necessary, even the definition used by psychologists that Emily Bazelon cites — repeated physical or verbal abuse, involving a power imbalance — is fraught with subjectivity and ambiguity.

I agree that we must not label all negative childhood experience as "bullying." But in these situations, as in any human rights violation, dismissing a person's reported trauma based on too strict a threshold can inflict further damage. If our ultimate goal is to prevent the negative outcomes related to bullying, we need to focus less on definitions and more on supporting children at risk.

DEBORAH TEMKIN
Washington, March 12, 2013

The writer is the bullying prevention manager at the Robert F. Kennedy Center for Justice and Human Rights.